he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
