We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
