Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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