My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
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