I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Randomize
