He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just invented taco cereal.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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