I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize