If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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