I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
