forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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