Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize