I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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