"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
