This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
