What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
