Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
