Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Randomize
