Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
