Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize