Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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