How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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