Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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