is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
