Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
