woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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