Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
