What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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