Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
