My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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