Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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