let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
