remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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