I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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