no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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