Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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