So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
