Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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