let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
