I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Less talking, more tequila
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
