Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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