i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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