My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize