YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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