yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
