I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize