the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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