i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize