I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize