420 ftw
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
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