i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
